Vendrick
HP: 11450
Skills: Sword Slam, Sword Swipe
Souls: 90000
Difficulty: 1/5
Deaths: 0
Now we move on to the 2 optional bosses of the game that are pretty much meant to be beat post game. First off we have Vendrick, the fallen king that turned into a giant ass, ugly hollow man. Contrary to popular belief, the 2 optional post game bosses are complete cake walks, and its pretty much true. Vendrick here is a pushover, if anything, he's just a cheap health sponge with an incredibly shitty move set and incredibly high, one shot worthy damage. A really lazy boss design IMO. To challenge him, you first need to obtain 4 "Soul Of A Giant" pieces, or you can't hope to damage him at all.
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| Big, butt ugly, and naked. |
Vendrick is a complete walk in the park, with only 2 attacks and with only 1 of it having different variations to it, there's really not much you need to look out for. He has a massive amount of health and his damage is so f**king high that no matter how tanky you are, chances are he will one shot you if he lands even a single hit. However, his attacks are SO SLOW and so highly telegraphed that its impossible to get hit by them. If you do get hit once though, you lose, and you'll need to go through his ridiculous HP bar again. If anything, he's just tedious.
Sword Slam - A vertical, downward sword slam. May sometimes use this multiple times in rapid succession. Just strafe to his non-sword arm to avoid it.
Sword Swipe - A horizontal sword swipe. PAINFULLY easy to see coming. Just block it, or strafe to his non-sword arm to avoid it.
As you can f**king see, as long as you strafe to his non-sword arm, this battle is a complete walk in the park. If anything, this is nothing but a massive training dummy with a ridiculous amount of health for you to cut down. Of course, as I mentioned earlier, if you get hit once you lose, so just follow the wiki's advice of equipping the "Red Tearstone" ring, then go get hit by those idiotic knights outside the king's tomb until you are 30% HP. With the attack buff in tow, your damage is increased, making killing Vendrick faster. As mentioned, it doesn't matter what your HP is anyway, so just get it lowered and get the damage buff to kill this faggot quicker.
Despite being completely melee and having only 2 melee attacks (a horizontal and a vertical swipe, go figure), the way to completely steamroll Vendrick is to constantly be in his face. His attacks are so slow to the point that simply WALKING to the side will have him miss it. I kid you not, you won't have to roll even once during this entire battle, just lock on to him, and strafe towards his non-sword arm. All of his attacks will miss you, and since he takes SO long to recover, you get free hits in every time. At times he will jump back to recover, all you need to do is run up to him and stick to his non-sword arm again. Rinse and f**king repeat until he is dead.
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| David and goliath. |
Vendrick is a complete walk in the park and a freaking pushover for a post game boss. Not that the following boss is much tougher, but you get what I mean. The legendary king who built Drangleic certainly deserves more than this.
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Ancient Dragon
HP: 19840
Skills: Fire Breath (Air)*, Fire Breath (Lower), Fire Breath. Stomp, Tail Slam, Bite
Souls: 120000
Difficulty: 2/5
Deaths: 10+
The other optional boss of the game. Simply one of the most amazing looking things in the game, the Ancient Dragon brings nothing but death and frustration to all who dare to face it. Like Vendrick, this was simply not what I expected from an end game optional boss. He is nothing but a massive health sponge riddled with nothing but instant kill attacks, much more so than Vendrick. However, unlike Vendrick, he DOES look cool.
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| Yeah, that's a dragon alright. |
Contrary to the size of the damn thing, yes, the Ancient Dragon can, and will, one shot you. I mean, you are the size of its freaking toe, there's NO WAY you can survive ANYTHING from it. With that in mind, you should, once again, remove ALL armor and go in guns blazing with a full-on offensive mindset, after all, this guy somehow can soak MORE DAMAGE than freaking Vendrick. He has a couple of attacks, though all of them are ridiculously easy to avoid. Again, this is nothing but a tedious suicide boss with nothing but cheap one shots and a lot of health, his attacks aren't even hard to avoid.
Fire Breath (Air)* - He flies into the air and sprays breaths of fire downwards, which splash in a massive AOE. You won't survive this.
Fire Breath (Lower) - He stands on his hind legs while on the ground and breaths fire in front of him. Once again, you won't survive this.
Fire Breath - A regular dragon's fire breath which he does on all fours looking forward. Nothing much to say, you know you won't survive this as well.
Stomp - He stomps any of his feet. Insane damage, you MAY survive if you are incredibly tanky, however, I wouldn't count on it.
Tail Slam - He lifts his tail and slams in into the ground. Since his tail is incredibly huge, this attack has massive AOE. Probably a one shot.
Bite - He bites forward with his massive head, lunging forward ever so slightly. I haven't got hit by this before, but I assume its a one shot.
What did I say? This guy is nothing but one shots, especially his fire breaths. He has 3 variations of it, but really, all you need to look out for is the one in the air. When his wings flap and he starts to take off, just f**king run to the other side of the map, wait for him to finish blowing his load, then run back to slap him, because this shit is f**king annoying. That is literally his only dangerous attack, and believe me when I say he spams the living SHIT out of this move. After probably one or two ground attacks, he takes flight and tries to cheese you, every, single, time.
Other than that though, this is an extremely straightforward fight. Like Vendrick, the Ancient Dragon's attacks are ridiculously slow because of his size. Whenever he lifts his foot or tail to slam you into the ground, you have a gracious amount of time to react. His health pool is crazy, almost twice that of Vendrick,, who has about 33% more than Nashandra, the final boss. This fight is long, tedious, and dreadfully boring. You are in no threat of actually die-ing to any of his ground moves, and sometimes RNG screws you as he takes flight to do his aerial fire breath near the edge of the arena, giving you little room to work with as you INSTANTLY die, bathing in flames.
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| F**k. This. Shit. |
Hit him anywhere, I mean, really, as long as he's on the ground, you're safe. Of course, try not to go for the tail, and if he does a breath attack on the ground, its easy pickings, enjoy your free hits. He is tanky as shit, you're going to need a long ass time to kill him. If RNG doesn't f**k with you and you just keep running the hell away when he does his aerial fire breath and hit him while he's doing jack dick on the ground, you will, eventually, kill the sucker. He is NOT worth the 120000 souls, and after I beat him once on my first character, I never went back to challenge this guy.
He is just so tanky, boring, repetitive, and lazy. For one of the coolest looking (if not, THE coolest looking) bosses in the game, he sure is one hell of a drag to fight.
